If farts were visible

Given a different design of eye in humans, the farts which they emit constantly, sometimes by accident and often by design, might be seen clearly not only to the farter but also to those around.

A green cloud might billow from the anus, the cloud varying in density and colour depending on the nature of gases within it, this in turn depending on diet, fitness, genetic makeup and environment.

In the undetected farter there is a sense of triumph, of violation of others, of childish antisocial activity, and there is a desperate desire not to be found out . At least that is the prevailing view held by socially aspiring Britons today. Asmission brings no rewards and no forgiveness. The open farter’s honesty is recieved with derision and contempt and with laughter in which, unusually, the object of the mirth feels uneasy at joining, knowing it will not bring inner comfort nor ease the disgust within others.

Like farting , lying is invisible. Like farting it is sometimes undetected by others and sometimes not. Unlike farting, lying is never undetected by the liar so it is never innocent in that way.

Like farting, the lie produces in the doer senses of triumph and shame, of getting away with it and a desire to remain uncaught.

In contemporary Britain the difference betwween society’s perception of farting as opposed to lying is that neither the doer nor the reciever of the fart feels that the act is in any way defensible , socially acceptable or excusable; Even farts brought on by failings of old age or by infirmity are scorned, perhaps more quietly , but secretly no less than if the farter is fit and well. No one likes or tolerates any fartting at all or if they do they themselves will be percieved as negatively by this society as will the farter .

Lying, however produces in others a hugely variable reaction, depending on the relative power of the liar compared with the lied to, depending on social groupings, on group or individual relativism ie expediency, and most of all depending on the structure and the priorities that society has built for itself. This variability of reaction is as likely to figure in the liar as in the lied to.

In addition , liar and supporters will not necessarily share the view of another group in the same society that the lie was a lie at all.There are no statutes which define truth and lies, there are no teachings in Bibles or Korans which annotate and define which words and deeds constitute a lie, even though a requirement of truth is fundamental to both.

This lack of definition has inevitably led to the complex system of ‘justice’ and ‘religions’ which satisfies only the group in the ascendancy. A court ruling will be seen by such a group as an utter vindication of the commission of lies. It will go much further in the mind of the liar than merely society letting him or her off. It will literally justify the original act.No strict liability here.

For the farter there is no justice, there is no justification, and there can be no vindication.

Masturbating in a public place; on a tube train, at a bus stop or in a cafe is not acceptable and gives anyone in eyeshot the ability to prosecute such an act as indecent upon which statute and precedent may secure conviction and sentencing of the ‘offender’. Of course the sentence is punishment by society. If a person sits on the same train or park bench next to the masturbator and farts incessantly and deliberately in order to offend other people, and even if this farter either chooses to abandon the denial procedure, society has chosen not to punish such a person.

If sitting between the two activists is a blind man, then by whom is the blind man offended? Not by the masturbator for he does not see it, and the noise of train or traffic obscures the noise. The stinking farts on the other hand will invade the sense of smell on which the blind man counts so heavily. To add to the difficulty he faces the blind man may not be able safely to move away as might someone else, so he has to endure this assault. Unable to gauge the attitude or size of the farter he dare take no action now and has no actionable case to bring later even if the farter were to stuff a paper on which was written name , adress and a full admission of the acts committed into the blind man’s pocket.

Where does this leave the liar, the farter, the masturbater, the blind man , the church and the justice system?

British society does not decide on acceptability of actions by means of considering the views of those members of society not in the ascendancy. As long as the powerful approve, then the act is allowed. Even less will it consider the sensibilities of those even lower in the pecking order – the old, infirm and thehandicapped. We will lock up a wanker but only if seen by an able bodied person. We will ignore antisocial acts even if they are relatively more hostile but only to low level citizens whilst continuing to punish acts which do not adversely affect those low level citizens. We will deride all others who commit acts that we most definitely have committed ourselves and will commit again, but we will not punish them for this same reason.

The blind wanker will be punished. The man who tells the blind man that the road is clear and sends him to his death will not.